The Telly Nelly Blog

'Ugly Betty' Finale Promises to be a Gay Ol' Time

So what's going down on the 'Ugly Betty' finale on May 17th? Pucker up for a juicy goodbye kiss as Betty and Henry's romance gets all steamy. Wilhelmina gets closer to her goal of ruling the world one fashion magazine at a time and Daniel goes deeper than ever before. (Get some depth loser!)

The Suarez family trip to Mexico gets dang dangerous while secretive secrets get secreted.

Tony-winner Kristin Chenoweth will play Diane, an orthodontic technician who becomes overly involved in her patients' lives - including Betty's.  (I'm expecting Henry's girlfriend will hook up with Betty's orthodontist...a blind tranny could see that one coming a mile away!)

The icing on the cake? Gina Gershon reprises her role as cosmetics mogul Fabia! Bitchin!

And it's all wrapped around a gooey, musical center...why, that's not just sweet, it's positively...

Yummilicious! Televicious! Fagtastic!

(On a totally unrelated note, I couldn't *believe* Vanessa Williams agreed to appear on last night's 'Shear Genius' - luckily she's so hot now, nothing, not even that stinking pile of Bravo-produced poop, can ruin her career. (Don't even think about it, I'm knocking on wood as I type.)

Reichen Joins Cast of here! Network's 'Dante's Cove'

That's right dearies - you'll get your Reichen fix when you tune in to 'Dante's Cove' this October!

For all the (not so) juicy details, read here! Networks' official release:

Reichen Lehmkuhl Joins the Cast of here! Networks’ Dante’s Cove

America’s Guiltiest Pleasure Gets a Lot More Pleasurable With the Cast Addition of Out Actor/Model/Author Reichen Lehmkuhl

here!, America’s premium gay television network, is pleased to announce that openly gay actor Reichen Lehmkuhl joins the cast as one of the new stars of season three of the gothic supernatural soap Dante’s Cove. Now in production in Hawaii, season three of the show will debut on here! in October 2007.

“We couldn't be more thrilled to have a talent like Reichen on board,” said Meredith Kadlec, Vice President of Original Programming for here!.  “He is the perfect triple threat for Dante's Cove – he has a loyal fan base, he is proudly out, and he is simply gorgeous.”

Lehmkuhl first rose to fame after winning the grand prize on the CBS show The Amazing Race. From there, he went on to build an acting resume with gigs including Frasier, The Drew Carey Show, Days of Our Lives and The Young & the Restless. On the big screen, he has been seen in films including Partners and The Scorned, as well as having a role in the here! Films project The Mostly Unfabulous Social Life of Ethan Green.

Off screen, Lehmkuhl recently published his first book, HERE’S WHAT WE’LL SAY: Growing Up, Coming Out in the U.S. Air Force Academy, which was published in 2006 by Carroll & Graf.  The book chronicles his experiences in the U.S Air Force under the United States’ “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy requiring gay and lesbians enlistees to remain in the closet. In addition, after serving as a spokesperson for jewelry designer Udi Behr for his international company Love and Pride (www.loveandpride.com <http://www.loveandpride.com/> ), Behr recently launched a new line, Fly Naked, based on Lehmkuhl and his love of flying.

Dante’s Cove, America’s sexiest guilty pleasure, was named the Best Soap Opera by leading gay and lesbian publication The Advocate in 2006. The series follows a cast of mostly gay and lesbian characters who all live together at the Hotel Dante in the sleepy beachside community of Dante’s Cove. When a dark, supernatural force is accidentally released from the basement of the Hotel Dante, the hotel residents are plunged into a world of intrigue, secrets and shifting romantic ties. 

On the show, Lehmkuhl will play Trevor, a business school graduate who comes to Dante’s Cove looking to find himself. While there he becomes quickly intertwined with the beautiful men and enigmatic forces crawling all over the island. His close association with the immortal witch Grace (Tracy Scoggins) draws Trevor into a magical world and a dark battle he never could have imagined.

The wildly popular Dante’s Cove recently became the first original series ever to be picked up for a third season by a gay television network. Lehmkuhl joins an already popular cast of actors including Tracy Scoggins, Thea Gill, Jenny Shimizu, Charlie David, Greg Michael, Michelle Wolff and Erin Cummings

Ellen's Got Back...Pain, that is...

Yes dears, you heard it from those deliciously press hungry folks at TMZ.com - Ellen's down for the count, but she's not out.

Such a trooper!!!!

Star Jones would have totally stayed at home...as would have dear Rosie. (No offense girls, but you're not *that* dedicated now are you?)

Oh, to be Ellen - if only for one day!

Rufus Pops Video Cherry on LOGO

From those lovely lads and ladettes at LOGO...gotta love 'em!

Rufus Wainwright gives Logo viewers exclusive behind-the-scenes look at making of new music video followed by world broadcast premiere

April 26, 2007 – Logo, a division of Viacom Inc.’s (NYSE: VIA and VIA.B) MTV Networks, today announced that it will air Rufus Wainwright: The Making of Going to a Town on April 27, 2007 at 8:00 PM ET/PT, followed immediately by the world broadcast premiere of Rufus Wainwright’s new music video “Going to a Town.”  The 30-minute special will give viewers a behind-the-scenes look at the making of the music video from his upcoming new album “Release the Stars.”

Wainwright will host a new episode of NewNowNext Music on Logo on April 29, 2007 at 12 midnight ET/PT that will re-air his new video.  The episode will repeat throughout the week leading up to LOGOonline.com’s audio stream of  “Release the Stars” from May 8-15, 2007. 

Wainwright is also scheduled to perform as a special guest in several select cities on the True Colors Tour presented by Logo featuring such musical legends as Cyndi Lauper, Erasure, and Debbie Harry, as well as up-and-coming artists like The Dresden Dolls, The Gossip, and The Misshapes.

Who Told the Biggest Lie?

Laura Dern, when she said she didn't get work for a year after her same-sex kiss on 'Ellen'?

-or-

ABC when it said it couldn't come to a 'View' contract negotiation agreement with Rosie O'Donnell?

I'm thinking Madame Dern is guilty...hello darling, it was your *acting* not your *kissing* that lead to a year of inactivity. Brush up on those skills. (C'mon, surely you've seen 'Jurassic Park' and 'Jurassic Park III: The Legend Continues for No Apparent Reason other than to employ Sam Neil')

Love to all!

I Watched 'American Idol: Idol Gives Back' Tonight

And overdosed on celebrities...good god, what a flagrant use of star-power!

I, of course, am referencing the 'American Idol: Idol Gives Back' 'Staying Alive' musical "number" where clips of all the new, now, next, not, old, was, and to be and has been celebrities and celebutants were shown capering about like mad fools in ecstasy in what can only be dubbed a celebrity brand orgy for FOX. (Given the near fatal doses of viewer exposure, these 'stars' might very well have a reason to dance about.)

Yes, moppets, I know it's for charity, the disease stricken, the poor, the homeless, the suffering, the wasted, the gassy...I could go on. It's important work, regardless of the mash-handed, 'Sonny & Cher Variety Hour' approach. Perhaps I'm just terribly bitter I couldn't pull such a coop out of my hat. I'm like that!

Still, I *was* disappointed to see Helen Mirren trot her stuff...I expected to see the likes of Dr. Phil (no link for you!), Teri Hatcher and Rob Schneider, but Helen...oh, that one hurt. Couldn't you have just given money from the comfort of your well-appointed media room?

A small bit of me just died. Why oh why must I watch 'American Idol' ever???

Blah and double-blah. Everything I hate is now holier than holy - I can't win!

Rosie O'Donnell Leaving 'The View'?

That's what TMZ.com is reporting darlings - supposedly the announcement will happen on today's program - if you're inclined to watch any potential drama unfold, do tune in to ABC at 10:00 a.m. ET. At least, I think that's when those hens gather to peck...I really have lost track, being a man and all.

You have been warned! (About Rosie, silly.)

She's probably leaving to dedicate more time to her gay sketch show that's airing on LOGO - 'The Big Gay Sketch Show'...check it out! It previewed last night but you know LOGO - reruns for days, weeks and months! I admit I have a preview copy I never got around to watching...just couldn't get interested in another sketch show, even if it is *gay*.

Toodles for now twatties!

Happy Earth Day Earth Muffins!

In honor of Mother Earth (total Dyke that she is, god love her), watch the Discovery Channel's 'Planet Earth' tonight - it's *amazing* in high-definition...and tonight is all about caves and forests - Fabulous!

It's probably my favorite nature program ever - my prior favorite was their 'Blue Planet' series from a few years back...intense in *every* imaginable way, you'll learn something fascinating about the world you live in *every* time you watch.

Truly there is no better TV to watch on Earth Day - enjoy!

(And my, but aren't those birds of paradise showy - they're nature's Drag Queens!)

Ted Allen Does Books Too!

A dear friend of mine just won a big 'Best of' Award - give him props!

But we all know you don't mean it - after all, *who* the hell lives in Portland, Maine? Seriously, if I wanted to bore myself to death I'd read a book, not read some blog about dusty ol' Maine drizzle! *giggle* I kid because I love...go Wil! Whoooo!

Speaking of books and blogging, this blog *isn't* about silly poofs like Wil, it's about silly FAMOUS TV poofs like Ted Allen from 'Queer Eye' fame, who will be appearing at the Los Angeles Times Festival of Books on Saturday, April 28th at 12:30 p.m. at U.C.L.A! Dear Foodie-Booty Ted'll be cooking from his book, "The Food You Want To Eat". And no, his wiener schnitzel will NOT be on th e menu. (Unless you're very, very lucky.) If you simply must have more information, go to www.latimes.com/festivalofbooks

As all gay events should be, this one is free and open to the public and books will be available for sale.  More info is available for you peeps with need for books in LA at this instant classic of a website:

What's most amazing of all - no-one paid me to say that - isn't blogging GREAT???!!!

Is Dr. Snuggles Gay? (And a random 'Shear Genius' rant too!)

No, I didn't watch 'Shear Genius' last night, though my trusty DVR did capture the offal dutifully as always. I mean, what's the point? It was quite obvious from the get-go that I couldn't pick a good haircut out of a barrel of monkeys with pickles up their bums! So...if I have no basis of what *is* a good haircut and what *isn't*, all I'm left to connect with are the individual personalities, most toxic at best, some down-right demonic in nature. (No running water on the set please - it upsets the vampires!!!)

But I digress...

This post is really supposed to be a treatise on whether or not the Norwegian Magi-Techno-Genius, Dr. Snuggles, was indeed a rampant homosexual when off the cartoon set. If you're an older biddy like me (ripe old age of 36 next week, muffins!) you might remember Dr. Snuggles and his wonderfully whimsical adventures with Dennis the badger (i think), an avian postal-worker, and a small mouse named Knabber. (1979!) Now that I think about it, it's really an earlier version of 'Magic Schoolbus' on PBS, but without the discipline or children. (Sounds much nicer, right?) Dr. Snuggles could invent anything with his quasi-magical inventing powers and his animate object friends (including a house, a spaceship, an umbrella and assorted other gizmos). The 'comeback pilot' has not lessened the gayness one wee-bit. Swisharama! I will say I thought the addition of a Dr. Snuggles nemesis unnecessary - it took the show to the level of 'Strawberry Shortcake and Friends' or 'The Care Bears.' ew! (Sour Grapes!)

There's a rather Paul Lynde-like spotted camel in the clouds drinking tee while his ribbon-adorned sheep frolic amongst the fluffy white towers of cloudy-goodness. There's 'Uncle Bill,' Dr. Snuggles aquatic 'uncle' who frankly, looks younger than Dr. Snuggles himself! (Just how much does Uncle Bill like fish anyway?) But company aside, Dr. Snuggles has a rather swishy manner of speaking, and with his English (?) drawl, he seems a bit like Mr. Howell from 'Gilligan's Island' who I always thought was gay anyway...Mrs. Howell was a drag queen, I'm *sure* of it! (In all actuality, Natalie Schafer, who played Mrs. Howell was wonderful...she's dead now, of course. O cruel world!!!!)

But again I digress!

Dr. Snuggles certainly seems quite gay - but that could just be due to the simple fact it was produced in the Netherlands - like the Teletubbies' - and therefore intrinsically bizarre with no inherent sexuality whatsoever. Sex neutral, like a sandwich! But um...could it be that the voice of Dr. Snuggles is Peter Ustonov???? Crikey!!!!!

But where's the fun in that? I like to think in a secret pocket universe, Dr. Snuggles is getting it on with Uncle Bob in his Lobsterscape off the coast of Maui...the world would be a better world were that the case, I'm sure of it!